Ted Cruz Drops A Hard, "Jiminy Cricket!" At An Iowa Campaign Stop While Talking About Condoms

 

 

Take it easy there, Ted!  You can’t just be throwing around JC bombs in a public place.  That’s a little too R-rated for the good folks in Bettendorf, Iowa.  You’re running for president. Clean up that language or you won’t be getting anywhere near the White House. Just kidding.  That might’ve lost him the race.  Why? Because I can’t have my president be a guy who says, “Jiminy Cricket!”  I just can’t. Saying Jiminy Cricket instantly disqualifies you from potentially occupying the most powerful office in the world. It just does. When did that movie even come out? The 1940s?  I’d feel much better if Cruz dropped a hard, “Jesus fucking Christ!” on that Iowa crowd. I don’t know much but I know a guy who says Jiminy Cricket can’t run the world. As far as Cruz talking about condoms and his days of laying pipe back in college, I couldn’t have been more uncomfortable.  It was like your creepy uncle telling you of his bachelor days and you wanting it to stop but him not getting the hints that you wanna crawl outta your skin. I bet Ted Cruz was telling all sorts of “doing girls” stories at Thanksgiving.

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